Taking responsibility for your life

Some people are used to blaming everyone and everything for their problems. When confronted with this or that problem, they often try to find an object to blame, thereby choosing the role of the victim. This may be a temporary relief, but it also keeps them tied to their problems. Accusations breed cynicism and hopelessness. If we start to believe that we are victims of circumstances and give up, we lose hope and persistence, we resign ourselves to our fate and stop evolving. Not everyone is prepared to accept responsibility for what is going on in their life and to take the initiative needed to deal with their problems. It's important to realize that you are the creator of your own life!

How to learn to read people.

Eye contact. In the look of a person at you, you can easily read whether you are interesting to him or not. If the person doesn't take their eyes off you, it could mean they have a romantic interest in you. If a person hides or looks away when communicating with you, this is a sign that he is nervous or hiding something. The person who stares into your eyes without blinking is probably lying to you, at this very moment.

How to manipulate a man to fall in love.

From time to time, do not pick up the phone and answer SMS after at least 20 minutes - should become your rule. He is after you, not you after him! So you make him worry about where you are, with whom and how you spend your hours. The more he thinks about you and worries, the more he falls in love with you. Pause and then show how much you missed him. And, of course, do not answer all his calls and texts after 22 pm - appreciate your boundaries.

About being happy.

Why is it that one person, after going to the theater or visiting a place, tells his acquaintances how wonderful, unforgettable it was, how he had a great time? And another person, having been to the same show, having gone to the same place, says that it was nothing special. Or that he did not like this or that, and it was not the way he had imagined, or the way it was presented to him. It's also a skill to notice the beautiful things around you, to focus on the positive things. It's a skill that can be developed. Setting goals, enjoying the process and achieving those goals - that's a skill you can learn, too! You can also learn to overcome difficulties in life, to perceive them not as problems, but as points of growth.

What helps us develop?

I’m the main partner, the main friend, the main support and pillar for myself. Things can change, but I stay with myself forever. That’s my central value around which I align all other areas of life. If there is a "do or don't?" question, I ask, "Do I want this? How will it affect me? Is it to my detriment or for my benefit?" This helps me make choices in the most difficult situations. I don't have the agony of a torturous choice, and it makes me feel relaxed. Do you do this? Do you feel better afterwards?

The World Cares About You.

If you were excited about this thesis, I'm going to disappoint you – the truth is that the world literally doesn't care about us. Of course, your friends and family may care about you and do you good. And there may be people in general who are willing to lend you a helping hand. But no more than that. The world can be a cold, harsh and unfair place. But are you here to whine? If you don't make an effort to make the world within your sphere of influence better, it won't get better on its own, either. The sooner you realize that the world owes you nothing, the sooner you can start taking action and getting what you want. This is what the world really owes you and allows you to do.

To live in harmony.

In harmony with yourself, with your loved ones, with the world. Who doesn't want that? Harmonization happens at the moment when a person: ▫️ clarifies his true values; ▫️ realizes their innate potential; ▫️ creates his or her own life principles, which he or she embodies in action. This makes one "alive," manifest, energetic, active, easy-going, and at the same time strong and committed to one's goals. Never neglect time "for yourself." A genius sleeps in all of us. And it's getting stronger every day.

Your intuition will tell you what to fill such a day with:

▫️ Meet with elderly relatives, look through family albums, gather the family around a big table for no reason, do something useful together. ▫️ Pay attention to relationships with near and dear people. Unexpectedly cancel all business and have a noisy meeting with friends or a date with a loved one. On weekdays, in the middle of the work day. Just like that. For yourself. ▫️ Dedicate a day to sports. Show initiative and build a team. Volleyball, soccer, jogging. A boost of energy and enriching socializing without obligation is guaranteed.

RESET DAY is a cool and easy way to be more productive

When I start to feel like a haggard, angry, green animal... Or not green, but definitely haggard. I make myself a RESET DAY. What is it? It's a day with no schedule, no planning, and no routine... No commitments. No courses, studies, or "work" meetings. A day where you just get high from the day itself. Zeroing in, recovering.

The Rule of Three Arguments.

As annoying as it is, this is not my invention. But it's a tool I enjoy using. It's said to have been invented by Homer in the 8th century B.C. So, I'll be consistent: First, we use the strongest argument, then the middle argument, and finally, the LARGEST ARGUMENT. Based on that, we don't use weak arguments at all. Notice? They do more harm than good! Your opponent will gladly latch on to a weak argument and give it maximum attention and time. Do not rely on the quantity of arguments, bet on the QUALITY.

Do you trust your plans?

By the way, this is also an important point. There is no more painful state, when the decision is made, the first steps are made, but somewhere deep down, a small black worm of doubt gnaws and gnaws at your inner content. Growth is often challenging, but that's no reason to limit your opportunities for growth. Create your new comfort zone with small changes for the better. Long-range goals are nice and appealing, but in a world of chaotic incremental change, they are vulnerable. But the next 2-3 days or a week is enough time to do something useful and promoting. Risk is present in any business, but you should not spend more energy on assessing risks than on implementing what you want to do. It's impossible to foresee everything, but it's easy to waste energy on imaginary negative consequences. Check yourself, which zone is the most developed and which is the most vulnerable?

Practice for motivation.

We are fully responsible for our lives, not only for our actions, but also for our inability to act. Catch the practice for motivation. I hope it helps your desire come true!!! Do the assignment for one month: ▫️Write down your wish (goal), accurately and in as much detail as possible. It can be anything: I want to buy a new car, go on vacation to the Maldives, make repairs, find a new job, start a new project, etc. ▫️Choose the type of physical activity you will do daily - exercise, run, pool, fitness (rocking abs, squats, push-ups), etc. You can choose several options and alternate. ▫️Every day, after your workout (exercise), think through the details of your desire. And be sure to write down something new and important. If you suddenly missed one day, do not get upset, but start from the beginning. It's a must!!!

Psychological age

Under psychological age, it is customary to understand a person’s ability to realize his “I” in the world around him, a person’s subjective feeling of his age, the correspondence of a person’s actions and behavior to socially expected patterns for his age. Simply put, if you sincerely believe that your age and what you should be doing at your age is solely a problem of the conservative thinking of others, you are very young at heart. If you are clearly sure that modern music is no good, today's cinema has fallen below the baseboard, and "it's cold in sneakers in winter" - with a high degree of probability your psychological age is older than your passport. Of course, unless you recently celebrated your 80th birthday and live somewhere in the Arctic.

What can you do on your own?

Start keeping a diary of your feelings/emotions during the day (write down 3-5 times a day what emotions you are experiencing right now). First try to determine which emotion you are experiencing at the moment - positive or negative. Next, try to determine which of the 5 basic emotions it is closer to: ⁃ Joy ⁃ Sadness ⁃ Anger ⁃ Fear ⁃ Disgust Emotions can be expressed with varying degrees of intensity and can mix with each other to form new emotions. If you cannot identify more than 3-5 emotions in a moment, I recommend that you start keeping a feelings/emotions journal to better start identifying your inner emotional state.

Alexithymia or I don't know how to explain how I feel.

Tell me, do you ever have this? Something is pinching somewhere, clenching, whether it's from joy or from fright, I can't exactly determine... People who have trouble identifying their emotional state are more prone to psychosomatic illnesses.

Negativity poisons life.

Resentments, painful memories, anger, dissatisfaction - these are often obstacles to a happy and joyful sense of life. Negativity often interferes with the energy of life and contributes to gradual emotional exhaustion. After forgiveness, we begin to look and feel much better. We begin to feel light and strong, energetic and thirsty for life. It is much easier to realize all the things we have dreamed of for years before, because now there are no barriers to action. And better to start with yourself. Think about what you need to forgive yourself for.

Self-actualization is not only a process of self-improvement and self-knowledge.

It is also the pursuit of inner potential, and this is the starting point in life. Recognizing your uniqueness is the first step to living the dream. You can set millions of goals, load your day with dozens of tasks, solve problems, read books, take classes, but all of this will be useless if you are moving in the wrong direction, if the goals and objectives are not aligned with the kind of life you really want to live.

Manuel Smith's Rules of Assertive Behavior.

- I have the right to express my feelings; - I have the right to express my opinions and beliefs; - I have the right to say "yes" or "no." - I have the right to change my mind; - I have the right to say, "I don't understand." - I have the right to just be myself and not conform to other people; - I have the right not to take responsibility for other people's problems; - I have the right to ask something of others; - I have the right to set my own priorities; - I have the right to be listened to and taken seriously; - I have the right to make mistakes and feel comfortable admitting them; - I have the right to be illogical when making decisions; - I have the right to say, "I don't care." - I have the right to be unhappy or happy.

Women love control.

It is important for them to know where, with whom their loved one is, whom he called now, what he ate for breakfast, whether he put on a hat, whether he fastened the shelf well, and so on. Doesn't it remind you of anything? So the parent often takes care of the child. Only excessive guardianship does not bring anyone to good. Ways to control your man are different. Someone checks literally every step of a partner, digs into his phone, monitors social networks, and is constantly jealous. And someone believes that the chosen one needs help in everything, that he cannot cope without advice. However, in any case, an adult man does not need control and checks.

Visualization.

To properly use the visualization technique, follow this pattern: - Take a comfortable position of the body and close your eyes. - Imagine that you are in a calm and pleasant place where you can easily relax. - Maintain the visual image and focus on the feeling of relaxation. Detail the image, presenting it in all its details (the sound of the waves or the singing of birds). Feeling that it is not possible to dive deeper into the state, begin to slowly return to the real world. Open your eyes and breathe slowly for a few minutes.