What does it mean to "love yourself"?

It means to appreciate and care, to be attentive both to your inner world and to external manifestations. It is to love your future and do your best for it. It is to appreciate your past and take experience and lessons from there. It is to constantly develop, improve, work on yourself and be able to recognize the truth and reality.

Strong emotions during parting, what to do?

The emotional component also plays an important role. If emotions are so strong, it is impossible to hide them in any case. According to most psychologists, all grievances and experiences must be thrown out. Cry, scream, laugh, break dishes, burn photos of them together and do it until you really feel better. You can even express your grievances directly to the offender himself, tell him: "I won't be bored, goodbye!" And most importantly, you should always remember that your ex-boyfriend is not to blame for not meeting your expectations. Since these were your expectations regarding this person, your desire for him to be like that.

Don't get used to indifference.

It is surprising and wrong when a girl gets used to the lack of attention, indifference to her person, sometimes even rudeness. These negative moments gradually penetrate into life and remain in it, becoming, as it were, the norm. And when a girl meets a really normal attitude towards herself, she perceives it as flirting, as courtship. And it can even deceive itself, wishful thinking.

Set up a personal life.

Personal life is not a husband and three children. This is what you are without them. The thoughts that your brain produces. The books you read. The food you eat and cook. The people you communicate with. Do you understand how many? That's why he loves you. And they love you as long as you love yourself: you take care of your body, pump your brain, communicate with the world.

Don't change your plans for him.

Often girls in love forget about personal plans for the sake of a man. They are always free and available to him. That's not how things will work. Be unavailable. A man will understand that you value your time, and he will have to try to be close to you. Remember: what is hard to get is treated more carefully later.

The role of the victim.

Under any circumstances, you now and then hide in a kind of cocoon. If a conflict arises, it is easier for you to shift the insult to the chosen one than to understand the root cause. You can spend hours talking about the fact that your husband loves only himself, and you put up with his bad temper. In fact, the situation is only getting worse! Try to work through your fears and finally understand that appreciating yourself is your task.

How to boost self-esteem and gain confidence?

▫️The first step in overcoming any bad habits is being aware of them. Observe yourseld. Instead of engaging in self-condemnation, try to get to know yourself by analyzing the way you behave. ▫️Change your social circle. Take note which people are present in your life and what is the essence of your relationship with them. Perhaps, if you objectively evaluate your environment, you will see that you give people more than you get from them.⠀⠀ ▫️Never forget about your strengths and don't be too hard on yourself. For personal use only, make a list of your inherent strengths and what you do really well. ▫️Keep calm and try to mitigate stress. Avoid the hustle and bustle. Develop stress resistance. ▫️You will gain self-confidence if you do the tasks you set yourself.

Returning to the topic of manipulation.

Narcissists like to quarrel on purpose, consciously, at the right moment. This is an element of manipulation. ▫️For example, quarrels happen just before gifting presents. Now, obviously, the person doesn’t have to gift you anything, and, as always, you are to blame. ▫️The quarrel is arranged in order not to fulfill a promise. They promised you something, but they weren't going to fulfill it. (I wanted to buy it for you, but because of your behavior and tantrums, I changed my mind.) ▫️The narcissist creates a situation so that the victim does not leave to meet with friends. Because, ideally, the victim should be isolated. After all, your whole life ‘should’ revolve around the narcissist! A few fights and now the victim no longer wishes to go to hang out with friends. It's easier for her or him not to meet their friends than to relive this nightmare again. Did you happen to notice this?

There are several questions for women who doubt the depth of their partners' feelings:

Do you think that his love is not real because he pays little attention? If you found out that it is true, how would you feel? How can you get this feeling in another way? Can you feed yourself with love? If so, how? What would you like to ask a partner about? What to find out? Is there any anxiety due to the fact that the relationship is on the verge of breaking up? If so, is this belief reasonable or do you just feel that way? On the one hand, we are familiar with that feeling when we are not loved. And yes, this feeling can be justified. It’s as if we tend to transfer old experience (our own or someone else's) to the current relationship. As for true love, try to understand: what is it? How do you feel it, what do you do and what do you get in return? And most importantly, gradually give this love to yourself. Then you definitely won't make a mistake.

Who surrounds you?

Let's do an interesting research to understand what kind of environment you have: supportive, helping you grow, or the one that slows you down? ▫️Write the names of 10 people you talk to. ▫️If a person is positive, he or she is in most cases optimistic, does not complain, is interested in self education, then put down a “+” next to his or her name. ▫️ If a person is always negative, always dissatisfied, complains, gossips, then we put “-.” Now we have two types of people: inspirers and firefighters. Inspirers are positive-minded people who will always support you with kind words. Firefighters will extinguish your enthusiasm at the first opportunity. From this day on — try to communicate more often with those who have a positive influence on you, and minimize communication with those who break plans and spoil the mood.

Friends that everyone should have

Fan - just like a football team needs fans, so we need a friend with support and faith. Faith that you will fly to the moon, just do not want to yet or are a little busy. A versatile personality is a lively person who does not sit still, and will not let you flatten the sofa. He will drag you to the mountains, to dances, to the big world - and you don't resist too much.

10 tricky tricks from psychology that are useful to know

7. Before an important interview, it is useful to imagine that we have a long-standing close friendship with the interviewer. It almost always depends on us how to perceive the situation, and our calmness and ease can be transmitted to the interlocutor. 8. If someone is angry with us, and at the same time we manage to remain calm, then the anger is likely to only worsen from this. However, later this person will become ashamed of his behavior. 9. When you have to do something especially responsible or requiring concentration, in a word, something that usually makes us nervous, it is worth trying to chew gum or even eat something. This is associated on a subconscious level with a sense of security, since we usually eat when nothing threatens us. 10. People tend to accept a smaller favor after they've refused us a larger one.

10 tricky tricks from psychology that are useful to know

3. When a group of people laughs, everyone instinctively looks at the one he likes the most (or at the one he would like to consider a close person). 4. A lot of useful information can be extracted by paying attention to the position of the interlocutor's legs. If, say, the toes of his shoes are facing the opposite direction from us, this usually means that the person wants to end the conversation as soon as possible. 5. Many of us have had occasion to attend a meeting in a situation where there was reason to expect sharp and unpleasant criticism from someone. Under such circumstances, it is best to sit next to this person. Practice shows that he will lose all his ardor and intent to attack, or at least be much softer. 6. A very useful habit is to notice the color of a person's eyes when meeting. He will unconsciously feel sympathy for us due to slightly lengthened eye contact.

10 tricky tricks from psychology that are useful to know

A few clever tricks from psychology that can make people feel or even act a certain way. Often the style of our behavior affects other people on a subconscious level. We may not even be aware of the effect produced. These tips can be very useful, but you can only verify this from your own experience. So worth a try! 1. If we manage to force ourselves to be sincerely happy when meeting someone, the next time we meet, this person will be glad to see us. By the way, dogs do this trick with us all the time. 2. When you go on a first date, it's smart to take your partner somewhere exciting. Subsequently, positive emotions from this meeting will be associated with us.

How to fight laziness?

The best way to cope with laziness is to find motivation in activities you really love. You should strive to do only what you want to do. Within the law and within the bounds of reason, of course ⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ▫️ Use less electronics and take more time off the Internet. So much use of electronic devices affects our brain health.⠀ ⠀ ▫️ Don't be afraid to stay alone. Take a day of silence once a month . ▫️ Write a plan of tasks (working or personal). After you write a plan, you'll have a burst of motivation to do all those things. ▫️ Start eating healthy. You are what you eat. Stop eating junk food that only ruins your health. ⠀ ⠀ ▫️ Run in the morning. Exercising in the morning will make you feel more energized throughout the day.

Delayed Life Syndrome

People, who constantly puts things off, and say to themselves phrases like that: "it's for a holiday," "I'll wait for a special occasion," "I'll rest after retirement," etc. suffer from the delayed life syndrome. It all comes from a deep childhood and low self-esteem. Parents often impose these views on their children, and then children do the same on their children. This syndrome can be compared to a road to "nowhere". The person wants nothing, they only do that he or she is urged. Such a person is completely miserable because life is passing by him or her. Thousands of people hate their school, their university, their job, the country they live in. Yet they continue to do nothing, complain about life, and continue to postpone pleasant and important things in life. When a person of this kind is sad, he or she begins to fight depression by gorging on foods, which leads to health issues.

Advice for anyone who wants to achieve something in this life

3. Be aware of what you are doing! Who are you, where are you and what exactly are you doing right now - these simple questions will help you get out of the inert state of inactivity, because of which people constantly postpone their affairs for later. This state does not allow us to change our comfortable and habitual existence, hinders our development. 4. There are no failures, there is experience! Even if you encounter problems along the way to your goal, remember that this is just an opportunity to correct your path, and not a reason to go the distance. 5. Just get started! It is human nature to doubt. You will never be able to 100% predict your path and get rid of your doubts. Action is the best cure for uncertainty and fear.

Advice for anyone who wants to achieve something in this life

1. Stop thinking bad about yourself! You are a unique person, doubting and not believing in yourself, you insult the great power that brought you to this beautiful world. Remind yourself of this often. 2. What others think of you is their business! If a person has not succeeded in the area in which he judges you, then his opinion is worth nothing. Developing people follow successful people and model them. They don't have time to judge. Judgment of others is the lot of losers who are marking time and are afraid to act. Are you interested in the opinion of losers?

Healthy relationships are freedom

• Freedom from shaking: where, with whom. Instead of control - trust, which grows out of a wonderful combination of "said and done." • Freedom from shame: I'm somehow different, not correct enough, smart, beautiful, good, and so on. Both know who they have chosen and accept each other for who they are. • Freedom from fear: to turn wrong, look wrong, be punished. In a healthy relationship, you can relax (not to be confused with permissiveness) and be a living person.

Common Gaslighting Phrases

▫️ "You made me do it..." Shifting responsibility for their inappropriate behavior. ▫️ "You're the only problem..." Denying their role in the conflict. ▫️ "You're crazy, I don't know what you're talking about..." Distorting your reality and your view of yourself. ▫️ " It's your own opinion, but no one would ever agree with you..." Creating fictional supporters to strengthen their position. ▫️ "You need to let it go, it's gone..." Justifying their unacceptable behavior. ▫️ "You imagined it, it wasn't like that..." Distorting your reality in order to prove their point of view. ▫️ "No one will love you like I do. Look at you, who needs you? No one will withstand you..." Distorting your reality in order to belittle you and your dignity.